Pope Francis continues to call the Church collectively and among individual believers to conversion: that change of attitude toward oneself and toward others which humbles our pride, inspires us to admit our failings, seek forgiveness and be receptive of the loving pardon of Our Heavenly Father.
It is a message which inspires hope, peace and tranquility.
So what is it that impairs or prohibits us from this conversion?
As I meditate upon the experience of my own spiritual life, the answer is very clear. I know this is true for me. See if you agree that the same applies to yourself.
The single and primary reason we do not experience conversion is this: we willfully resist.
I believe this resistance is one of the major aspects of our fallen human nature. It is part of the human condition. Sin disordered us. We were incapable thereafter of acting as Our Creator intended, that is, that we recognize those choices which are good for us and that we exercise our freedom of will and opt for those choices.
My experience actively ministering for many years tells me that people really do want to change, they want to submit themselves to the wisdom and Grace of the Lord, they seek the serenity which results when one walks in the light of the Gospel and in harmony with Almighty God’s Will.
Yet, no matter how sincere I and they are, our errant wills resist that conversion.
And so, it appears that, if change is really going to take place within us, we must deal with this willful resistance.
How?
The Scriptures provide remarkable insight into the process.
First and most necessary, we must admit to ourselves that we are spiritually and morally broken people. We must confess to ourselves and to the Lord that, left to our own designs, our lives would spiral downward in an endless and destructive pattern of self-gratification and isolation from God and others.
This honest assessment of our wounded nature must necessarily take place and precede the next step: repentance. At this stage in the conversion process, we move from insight regarding the present condition of our lives and begin to apply that insight into practical actions which turn us away from self toward the impact which our selfishness has upon all the relationships which are part of our lives: with family members, friends, co-workers, members of the communities of which we are a part, and most importantly, our relationship with God Himself.
Still, our resistance to conversion is strong because, precisely at the most critical stage of repentance, we begin to recognize that the conversion we long for will result in a kind of death.
No one wants to die, not even in relation to various aspects of our lives. Death is terrifying to the human ego which understands that conversion of any kind will infringe upon the rampant willfulness that lives within each of us. The very idea of conversion seems to trigger a self-defensive response within our broken nature.
This is the moment when we begin to convince ourselves, wrongly of course, that we are incapable of the conversion to which the Lord is calling us. We tell ourselves we are not that holy. We are not that strong. We are not capable of the virtuous life of faith. We are not ready. The timing is all wrong. We need to change, but not just yet.
Pope Francis instinctively understands this as he encourages the Church to adopt the most effective approach in meeting with the resistance of sinful humanity. And the approach which the Holy Father urges is one of compassion and charity.
I have thought about this for quite some time as I have questioned Pope Francis’ constant call for the Church to adopt an attitude of “accompaniment" in proclaiming the Gospel.
I have struggled for a long time over what the Pope means. And because I did not (and perhaps still don’t) fully understand his meaning, many of his pastoral initiatives have confused me.
Truly, I have thought and prayed about this often since Pope Francis assumed the Pontifical Office.
Slowly, I have come to believe that, by “accompaniment", the Holy Father means that the Church (Her Pastors and the Christian faithful) need to develop a strong, trusting relationship with suffering and sinful humanity. Perhaps, this will be the first relationship with someone who sees and loves them as they are in their brokenness and sinful selves.
Modeling the Church on the ministry of Christ Himself, Pope Francis understands that people change in a climate of acceptance and love.
This is the paradox of Christianity (the paradox of Pope Francis’ Pontificate): we must accept people exactly as they are before we can assist them in the process of conversion. The Church must embrace sinners while they still sin, in the state of imperfection and alienation.
The Church cannot (never, ever) say: “Repent! Convert! And then come join us!”
Rather, as the Pope frequently reminds us: love heals, and when someone feels loved and accepted by another and seen as the kind, loving person that they are, they can begin to see themselves through the same lens. Then, and only by the mystery Divine Grace and Charity, the block of resistance may recede and lasting conversion may begin to occur.
Perhaps, this is why Pope Francis can accept people in the state of sinful behaviors and lifestyles and welcome them to the Communion Table, to the Liturgy and the Sacramental life of the Church, without fear that somehow the Gospel and the Church Herself will somehow be corrupted in the process.
And so, Pope Francis is calling the Church Herself to conversion by the very same process which the Church pursues in seeking to assist others to convert their lives to Christ.
As individuals are resistant to change, we have seen how the Church Herself is resistant. She will need the very same acceptance and love She seeks to share with others. She will need the same encourage, patience and pardon She seeks to bestow on others.
The Church will need to admit and confess her faults, her sins, her failings. The Church will need to seek the Lord’s pardon and forgiveness. And the Church will need to actively engage Herself in a conversion of spirit and will to humbly and lovingly proclaim God’s Loving Mercy to people weakened by and living in sin.
I will think about this more and more in the days ahead.
It will inspire many prayers on my part, I am sure.
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